It’s also hilarious and wild. It’s like Fritz the Cat meets Hunter S. Thompson, caricatures exploring an exaggerated gallery of pornography infused with poetic prose. Stuart Lancaster provides an unrelenting narrative that takes us for a ride through Small Town America, where we peek in on the secret goings on among the locals. As it turns out, most of them are usually naked and involved in pursuit of their carnal desires.

There’s a whole list of things one might find offensive about this film, but that’s none of my business. At the core of each stereotype, there is a kernel of truth and an undeniable authenticity. The characters are vividly honest about the kinds of things that would cause puritanical types to avert their eyes. If a viewer hasn’t giggled, chortled, or guffawed by the time Dr. Lavendar turns into Raging Queen and screeches, “Vacate my closet immediately!” then wacky retro social satire probably isn’t their kind of thing.

Visually, it was a clever and captivating film of carefully composed images, simultaneously stunning and shocking. Sometimes it was like looking at art. Sometimes, the art was a big gorilla humping uberBarbie on a crazy see-thru mattress. I don’t know what else to say. It’s a long film. Make popcorn. Prepare yourself, and don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Ultra Vixen Fun Facts

• Tagline: “Six Chicks in search of a Cluck! . . . and so hilariously funny.”
• Roger Ebert is credited as a writer under the name R. Hyde.
• Kitten Natividad (main char. Lavonia/Lola Langusta) appeared in 57 films during the ’70s and also won Miss Nude Universe in 1970 and 1971.
• Russ Meyer had an extensive career in film as writer, director, producer, and actor. He also served as a US Army combat cameraman during WWII and was a well-known professional photographer. The still images in Giant are his work, as are several Playboy centerfolds, including his wife Eve in 1955.
• IMDB entry for Beneath the Valley of the Ultra Vixens (1979).

Jotunheimen scenery by tore_urnes

This is the kind of movie that begs for betting on who dies first . . . and last. The film’s creep-factor is high, and at times, the tension is palpable. The viewer’s surprise and curiosity tracks effortlessly along with the characters on screen, as we discover pieces of the twisted truth that began with a little boy lost.

Bullet Points:

• Subtitles, Bloody Murder, and Tame Sexiness
• Beautiful Snowy Landscape
• There’s a sequel: Cold Prey II (Fritt Vilt II)

I can’t really call this a “slasher film” because the weapon of choice is a pickaxe, which is really more of a bludgeoning and piercing weapon. Thematically, however, the story moves along the same tracks made by so many prececessors. For me, it stands out because whereas so many recent slasher flicks approach their scripts with a tongue-in-cheek awareness of the expectations of this particular genre, Cold Prey sticks to preserving the illusion that we are witnessing reality. Subtleties in the acting make this movie easier to feel; viewers have an opportunity to connect with the characters (something often lost in other films of this type where “characters” often are nothing more than “caricatures”).

About the Location:

The story takes place in the Jotunheimen mountains (“home of the giants”) where many peaks rise higher than 6,000 feet (1,900 metres) and men have hunted there since the Stone Age. These mountains take their name from the otherworldly land of Jötunheimr from Norse mythology, home to a race of extraordinarily large and fierce creatures called the Jötnar. It may be worthwhile to have a second or third look at this film, keeping these mythological roots in mind.

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tore_urnes

Ain’t that always the way? When will we ever learn.

This is a modern day B-Movie with a message and a bonus: Tom Skerrit in saucepan armour. The script is actually entertaining though a bit heavy handed, with amusing little twists on the usual monster movie moments and the occasional groaner of a joke. The acting teeters on the edge of excess, though characters seem honest in their stereotypicality. There’s a mad scientist, a bitchy hardass female agent, a yokel sherrif, alien invaders, and of course a multitude of delicious teenagers to eat and stomp and mangle when the monster runs amok.

Flickr Commons Image by Hawkoffire

The real wooly mammoth (Mammuthus primigenius) was a docile, flower-eating creature. Herds of these great animals (10ft tall at the shoulder) roamed through North America during the Late Pleistocene Epoch before being hunted to extinction several thousand years ago. Really, that’s a good thing, because had they met any Colonial North Americans, surely they would have have been captured, costumed, and forced to perform in a circus for our amusement and edification.

I don’t exactly have a rating system for movies (that’s all arbitrary anyway), but this is what I call a “Saturday Morning Movie.” Perfect for watching in your PJs with a bowl of popcorn for breakfast. Even though witnessing an Ice Age Mammoth on steroids rampaging through the community was really cool, my favourite scene is probably the severed hand doing sign language in the microwave.

P. S. “Ont-day Ust-tray Ese-thay Overnment-gay Ooges-stay.”

It’s a crazy future in the city of Tokyo, where the police regularly combat mechanized mutants called Engineers. Cut off a limb, and it sprouts anew, miraculously transformed into badass weaponry. Ruka is a beautiful cop, an Engineer Hunter with a samauri sword, and she knows how to use it. That’s a good thing, because this movie begins with an epic battle, and the bloodshed doesn’t stop there. It seems like it doesn’t stop ever, except during the “comic relief” of pop-style commercials for teenage cutters.

Visit the website or watch the trailer on YouTube**.
**Note: It gives away some of the better splatter effect scenes.

In an interview with Twitch, Director Yoshihiro Nishimura explains that since his youth the “distorted human bodies depicted in some of Dali’s paintings” have inspired creativity in him. That surreal and twisted sense of reality is evident in his work. If snail-girl doesn’t get to you, croc-girl just might. In order to develop the screenplay for Tokyo Gore Police, he revisited his independent film Anatomia Extinction (made ten years prior).

Yoshihiro Nishimura is well known for his work in special effects make-up, and Twitch also informs that Machine Girl director Noboru Iguchi (who directed the commercials in Gore Police) will be working with Nishimura on a new project called Drill Bra Sisters. I’m sure it both lifts and separates.

Five Reasons to See This Movie:

1. Sylar plays Spock.
2. Death of a Red Shirt.
3. Spock, Kirk, Bones, and Scotty are true and believable.
4. They alter the space-time continuum.
5. Come on! It’s Star Trek!

I’ve watched pretty much every episode of the original Star Trek TV series, plus the cartoon, and I was faithful to the Next Generation series. I think I’ve seen all the movies, though my memory is sketchy on a couple of them. I even watched most of Deep Space Nine, but by the time Voyager and Enterprise came along, I was pretty much Trekked out. Still, I reckon it’s safe to say I’m a fan.

Two standout scenes for me were the first attempt to destroy the Romulan drill and Kirk’s trek through the snowy wilds on an M-class planet. Space battles are great and all, but not really my thing. I like those little moments that create a memorable widening of the pupils and a sharp intake of breath.

Zachary Quinto as Spock

You may recognize this Vulcan as the cold-hearted Syler from the TV series Heroes. He really embraced the true spirit of Spock as a character and the resemblance is uncanny.

Zoe Saldana as Nyota Uhura

Somebody said there was no evidence of strong women in the film. I disagree. There were plenty, but the only one with some time to develop was Uhura. I thought Zoe Saldana did an excellent job as the no fuss, none-of-your-business communications expert. Ooh and she’s in a juicy secret relationship with a certain commander!

Chris Pine as James Tiberius Kirk

This was the backstory that most interested me, and Chris Pine did an admirable job of portraying the brilliant but arrogant farm boy turned space crusader. Big props to Jimmy Bennet for being a kick ass young boy Kirk.

Karl Urban as Dr. Leonard “Bones” McCoy

I didn’t recognize Karl Urban, but as soon as he came on screen I knew he was McCoy. All the right sass and brass for a Chief Medical Officer.

Simon Pegg as Scotty

It was late in the film, and I’d almost forgotten about Scotty, but boy was I ever glad to see him! Scotty was one of my favourite characters, and Simon totally pegged him. It was gleeful to hear him say, “I’m givin’ her all she’s got!” You might remember Simon from Shaun of the Dead.

John Cho as Hikaru Sulu

I always liked Sulu. He’s a good man to have around, because this Sulu carries one hell of a switchblade. It took me a minute to recognize John Cho (from Harold and Kumar). How fun to see him in this role!

Anton Yelchin as Pavel Chekov

Chekov is so freakin’ adoreable. That accent . . . what is it about that accent? Planet Wulcan. Kiptin Kerk. If he came over for dinner, I’d totally make some piroshkis.

The Union Movie Website

Filmmaker Adam Scorgie investigates the illegal underground marijuana industry in British Columbia (worth $7 billion annually) and interviews experts from around the globe. Physicians, phsychologists, police officers, economists, growers, and politicians shed light on how marijuana became illegal and provide insight on health risks as well as the potential medicinal and industrial uses for cannabis. I appreciate an entertaining and well-researched documentary, especially when it has an appearance by Tommy Chong.

Sweet Mary Jane, she’s so misunderstood. Just an ordinary plant, makin’ its way on our Green Earth, providing medicine, pleasure, and valuable fibres that have given much good to mankind for centuries. Thomas Jefferson grew it, and The Declaration of Independence—the very piece of paper upon which the United States of America was founded—is made from hemp. Yet it is one of the most villified natural substances in the world.

With millions of dollars spent on the nebulous “war against drugs,” I was surprised to find out that an enormous percentage of that money is spent to combat marijuana, with a measly amount left over to spend on the very dangerous, very addictive refined pharmaceutical drugs like cocaine, heroin, crack, methamphetamine, and rohypnol (that’s “the date rape” drug, Roofies). An astounding number of people are arrested in the US for posession of marijuana, more than the number of people arrested for violent crimes. Another interesting factoid: a rapist or a murderer could get a student loan for college, but a convicted pot smoker would be denied. Are you kidding me???

Pharmaceutical companies have an enormous stake in maintaining the criminal status of marijuana. Plants cannot be patented, and Big Pharm makes their bank on man-made chemicals which can be patented, claimed, and marketed. In a capitalist society, there’s a lot of money to be made on the back of suffering. The government, too, is in a terrifically awkward position. After all these years of demonizing cannabis, it’s not a simple task to undo the damage of decades of anti-marijuana blustering.

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Neeta Lind
Nickel Bag of Funk

Ip Man is the cinematic biography of Wing Chun Master Yip Man, who was the shifu (teacher) of Kung Fu legend Bruce Lee. The story takes place during the Sino-Japan war in the ancient city of Foshan, which was recreated in Shanghai for filming. It’s a Kung Fu epic in the classic sense: a larger than life Kung Fu master teaches his secrets to the oppressed, who rise up against enemy warlords and reclaim their way of life.

“We wanted to do this movie because Ip Man was a man who inspired the world and society as a whole. He was a man who believed in certain morals and principles, and we want to use this movie as a platform to convey those values to the audience. For me, that was the most important part of making this movie.” —— Director Wilson Yip

The art of Wing Chun is characterized by close body contact, and focuses on deflecting or redirecting an enemy attack. According to the Wiki, “a correct Wing Chun stance is like a piece of bamboo, firm but flexible, rooted but yielding.” Ip Man moves willfully, never overcommiting, balancing speed and power in calculated aggressive and explosive attacks. As noted in the Wiki, “a common Wing Chun saying is ‘greet what arrives, escort what leaves, and rush upon loss of contact,’ regarding the importance of trapping incoming force and advancing quickly when an opening is sensed.” The film’s fight sequences clearly illustrate the difference in fighting styles among opponents and the many ways in which Kung Fu can really f*ck your sh*t up.

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When I started watching this movie, I missed the first few minutes (arguably the most important part of any film) and for a little while thought it actually was a documentary. It didn’t take long to see it was scripted fiction. I was not, however, prepared for the level of brutality at the core of the film.

There is something to be said about watching. Watching is participating. Early in the film, there is a moment where a soldier films a scorpion being mobbed by ants. I kept thinking to myself, why doesn’t he help it? Why is he just standing there watching it die? I think, in the midst of all the controversy caused by this film, people missed that very important point. The camera becomes the eye, and by watching the film ourselves, we also participate in the events that take place on screen.

Some call it anti-American propaganda. I call it thought-provoking. Like it or not, the film explores some disturbing things about human nature and the transformation of ordinarily good people under extreme conditions.

This is a film that some might find hard to stomach, but I believe it is very much worth watching. For me, it stirred up complex emotions and caused reactions that made me feel awful, yet I was glad I felt so awful. I cried countless times. I yelled at the TV. It made me angry and sad and sometimes heartbroken.

I highly recommend this film, but have a box of Kleenex handy.